I have been getting a fairly consistent stream of e-mails asking about K. I have called him my quasi bf and he is a little more than that at this point. I have been quiet about him lately on this Blog, because I am conflicted about what we have and what we can have. I am incredibily physically attracted to him. He is an all-American-fucking hottie. I enjoy his company. We have fun together and he is intelligent enough to talk to when my hard-on is gone, which is a very rare combination.
The whole "having a relationship with a guy who wants to be my fag thing..." remains an issue. I have gone back and forth in my mind about whether this is my issue or his issue. I have posted about one role-playing game I played with him. I haven't posted about some others. The games where fine, but frankly as I told him last week when I got back from my trip, "I'd rather fuck him than have him watch me fuck other people".
So, we had another really in depth conversation about him. To respect his privacy (seriously), I am not going to get into every specific detail. After hearing his story, it is amazing he is as together as he seems to be. We all have our stories. Being who we are definitely has a level of hurt and emotional pain caused by those in our lives who don't or refuse to accept us. He had a very hard family life. He was on the street alone as a teenager. He bounced around and was exploited. He was fairly brutally raped by a guy he knew casually. Most of his previous relationships have been with older dominant guys and he has developed a preference for this dynamic in relationships. And (drums rolling here), he loves me. This popped out during our conversation.
After hours of talking, I may have had a epiphany. K kept saying that, "To me its all about you..." He has said this previously, but I may not have been hearing him in the noise of everything else we discussed. We have been together about 5 months. I have been fumbling around trying to understand what I needed to do to get close to him and it appears that I just need to be me. He was very clear that if I needed something, I need to say something. So, I flatly asked him if I just need some vanilla intimacy is that where he can be? He says, "Yes".... so, I guess we will take it as it goes for now.
Fast foward - Friday afternoon I called K and told him to meet me at my place after work. I also gave him a shopping list for dinner. We cooked dinner. We ate it. Enjoyed a DVD I rented. Then we went upstair and I fucking used him.
We started off by making out for a few minutes. I could not resist not having his clothes off and I told him so. We both undressed him with each of us tearing something he was wearing off. I pushed him down on the bed and really started to enjoy his ass. He has a nice firm hard round ass. It is smooth and it smelled of my soap. Obviously, he had prepared for my treat. K is very responsive and he bucked and his ass clinched as he moaned in response to my munching. It didn't take long until the hardness of my cock changed my focus. I hurriedly tore off my clothes.
I lifted K up and flipped him over on his back. I wanted to see his face. I wanted to kiss him. I wanted him to watch the pleasure on my face as I took him. I told him to keep his eyes open and look at me. Without losing eye contact, I grabbed my cock as I lifted his legs up above his head and rubbed my cock along his crack. I could feel the dampness from my munching and when my cock hit his hole, I jammed it into him with all the thrust I could muster. He gulped and I could feel his ass adjust around me. It was clenching and opening and the whole time K's green eyes stared up at me.
I started sliding in and out of him building up tempo until I was pounding him so hard I could hear the smacking of me against him. He just moaned and met my thrusts. After a few minutes, I manuevered him back around until he was lying on his stomach and continued to drill him hard. Then when I felt the pressure building in my cock, I just let loose. I didn't say anything. I just finished. Fuck it felt so good!
We did it twice more through the night. This morning all was good and we spent a leisurely morning around the City. So, that's where things are with K..................
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8 comments:
This is pretty sweet. He seems like a cool AND sexy guy.
so, do you love him?
we are clapping. why? read your past blogs on K and was moved by a series of comments "living this" made to one of your entries. looks like you employed some good advice. "living this" alluded to the fact that there was waaay more to K that hid below the surface (and that you just had to take the time to find and unlock it). looks like you did. your sex life is clearly awesome with him. continue the "vanilla" stuff to show him what a "healthy" sexual and non-sexual relationship is like. keep it up. you've helped him in more ways than you know. but he still has a lot to learn. it wont be overnight. good luck. and definately keep us posted.
im glad things are progressing as they are with K. im really rooting for him and you.
k. is a total nutjob. drop him off at the aslyum and find someone else. who needs someone with so many issues? he loves you? im sure he thinks youre his daddy too and that youll protect him. ahaha. what a loser.
i can completely relate to this split betw lust and love with another man (and i think it's a huge epidemic among gay men)
but what i really like here is the way you're walking into your fear, using your power over K in a responsible, and yes, even loving way
that piece of this melts my heart (and makes me pretty hard too)
any updates?!
that was a reall great post. it reall takes being a man to tell a great fuck that you want some intimacy from him. the fact that there is some love AND blinding lust at the same time is what, for me, would make for the beginning of a great relationship.
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