Sunday, April 27, 2008


When I started to write this entry in the Blog, I went back and checked and I have not written about K since last November. I have studiously avoided him in life as I have in writing about him here. I still hear from him and see him on the Metro occasionally. He is still a beautifully handsome man. We talk on the Metro and his messages and texts me occasionally. He is still a damaged soul and it is unfortunate. I feel that my unwillingness to deal with his issues has quite possibly damaged him more and that pains me.

K knows that I am with cherryboi. We bumped into him at Gallery Place several weeks ago. He was leaving as we were arriving to see a movie. I am not trying to exaggerate, but I thought he was going to cry. There was such a pained look on his face when the realization came to him that I was with someone. I was put in a position where I had to introduce cherryboi to him. I explained to cherryboi over Häagen-Dazs after the movie that K and I had dated before he and I had met. I didn't go into a lot detail, but K's reaction was jarring enough that it came up after the movie.

cherryboi: "Who exactly is K?"

me: "We dated before I met you. It didn't work out and it's over."

cherryboi: "Does he know it's over?"

me: "If he is listening to what I have said to him over the last few months, he knows."

cherryboi: "He acted like he just caught his boyfriend out with another guy."

me: " He bumped into a guy he used to date with a hot young new boyfriend. Frankly, I am not sure I would have reacted much better seeing him with someone new after I broke it off with him."

cherryboi: "Do you still fuck him?"

I looked into cherryboi's eyes waiting for the next question as I said: "No, I don't fuck him anymore." The next question didn't come and he seemed to loose interest in K as a topic of conversation.

I received a long rambling e-mail from K several days later. He cares for me. It hurts to know that someone else is with me. yada yada yada. Then he offered that I could have him whenever I wanted, even though I had a boyfriend. I didn't respond to his messages, but each one was slightly more irrational than the last.

The whole experience made me numb. I'd like to say that I don't care about K, but that would be a lie. Seeing him react to cherryboi was uncomfortable. The emotions in his e-mails afterward were unsettling. There are still feelings there.

Friday, April 18, 2008

The Cop

The Cop has still been calling and dropping by on a fairly regular basis. The last two times he called before this last Monday evening, I have had to brush him off. Monday he called in the late afternoon and we arranged for him to drop by after 8:00PM. When he arrived with some wine and a big smile on his face, I told him we needed to chat.

The long and short of our chat was my coming clean that I am in a relationship with a new guy - cherryboi. I explained to him that this was the reason for the brush-offs recently. cherryboi has class on Monday's, so the coast was clear. The Cop was totally unconcerned. It turns out he has a "girlfriend" that he is seeing too. I wasn't shocked, but I was surprised. This dude is a total sub when my cock is in him. The Cop was frank with the explanation that he is closeted and plans to remain that way. He seemed concerned that I was planning to discontinue our hook ups. I am not planning to stop hooking up with him at this point. Let's be honest. I am feeling a tinge of guilt, but not enough to commit to monogamy yet. I get off on fucking a very hot cop.

So, the wine led to more wine and some cheese. We started messing around on my living room couch. The wine and messing around led to some poppers and my hands clamped on the The Cop's head fucking his face. Soon, I was straddling his face on the floor aggressively feeding him my cock. He was taking every thrust. I'd give him some air to breathe every few minutes and dangle my balls over his face for him to lick and suck. Then I'd ease my cock back into his mouth and start working it down his throat. He was taking it like a champ. After a few reps of alternating between feeding him my cock and then my balls, I cupped my ball sac in my hand and road up and pushed my ass crack into his face. I didn't give him a choice and soon I could feel his tongue exploring my crack and darting at my hole. It was tentative, but it was a start. I figure I'll explore rimming with my cop another time. I pulled back and presented him with my cock again and he gulped it back down. The blowjob had lasted long enjoy that my cock was incredibly sensitive to every sensation at this point. I could feel a load building to the point of no return. It occurred to me at this point that The Cop had never officially taken my load in his mouth. He always seemed to pull off in the end or end up with my cock in his ass. In this position, he didn't have much choice. As I was ready to blow, I eased my cock deeper into his mouth and put my hand on the back of his head to hold him on. I shoot a big load of cum into his mouth and down his throat. With the first big spurt I could feel his head try to move away, but I held him firmly. There were 4 or 5 more large spurts, but I held him firmly and did not let him pull off. He half choked or maybe half gagged, but he swallowed it all. I started gently thrusting again working my now softer cock in and out of his mouth. I could feel his tongue licking my soft cock. I wanted him to savor the taste. It was the first of many loads that he will take.

When we had recovered, we headed upstairs to my bedroom. Once in bed we messed around some more. Soon, I had The Cop on his back at the edge of the bed with his legs pushed up beside his head and me standing along the bed slamming my cock into him. After sucking my cock, drinking my load and messing around, he was totally horned. The harder I slammed my cock into him the more he moaned and bucked his hips and clawed at the bed covers. His cock was like stone and the head was coated with pre-cum. I wrapped my fist around the wet head of his cock and began stroking him as I fucked him. Suddenly, he grabbed handfuls of the bed covers and literally screamed out as his 8-pack abs. I shot a second time almost immediately. The clenching of his ass around my cock as he came finished me off.